I wrote “A Story” because it was a chance to look back at my 3-year struggle with depression from a new perspective. I’m realizing that although my brain is naturally susceptible to the disorder, I also allowed the weight of people’s judgments to negatively influence me. I stopped doing things that were vital to me out of fear and misplaced expectations.
There are some wonderful changes happening in my life. I’m realizing a little more of my purpose and I really feel that God is laying the foundation for what’s to come. It’s like building a house. The cement that has been mixing and churning is finally being poured into the trenches.
As you can imagine, the view from within the mixing drum has been anything but tranquil. This summer hasn’t been easy, but it’s been powerful and deeply meaningful to me. Two things stand out to me as major catalysts for the changes inside of me.
I’m doing some good work with the Beloved Community Center and the experience there has caused me to really think hard about what I believe and why. I’ll post on that soon, so I won’t go into detail here.
I’ve also been blessed with a beautiful relationship. It’s not new, but until this point it was too tenuous and fresh to even speak about here. Or maybe I was the one that was too fragile. Either way I’m excited to go on this journey. I know now that what we have is real and worth fighting for.
So I wrote “A Story” in part because I want to understand and advocate for others. I believe that starts with understanding and being able to vocalize my own story. This is where I’m at for now. Tomorrow may be a different story :)
